SO I have a question for you, would you like to be your ideal body shape or fit and healthy? We talk so negatively about our bodies and punish ourselves far too much - do these comments sound familiar?
"I hate my thighs"
"Does my butt look big in this"
"I wish I had a six-pack"
" She is so lucky she can eat what she wants"
"I wish I was skinny"
"I wish I didn't have tuck shop arms"
"I am too tired to exercise"
"I don't have time to train today, had a busy day and the kids....."
You get the idea. We are never freaking happy! Something is always happening or "stopping us". There is never going to be a perfect time to commence any change in life, but you have to give it a crack. I love that I have fallen down so many times in my life, because I am a stronger and more determined person for it. I can reflect back on those times when other hurdles appear and know that I will be able to deal with this because I have before. I now believe in myself and I know I can achieve things if I set my heart, soul and my mind to it. Some of us still choose to change our lives by thinking fad diets, quick fixes, or overdoing it with countless exercise classes, give up and wonder why we bothered as nothing worked, did it?
Ahh yes... the whole "quick fix" and "I want it now" syndrome. Very common in western society, mostly among women. We quickly drop our IQ because a magazine cover tells us that we can drop 10kgs in five seconds... Think about the other areas of your life, your home, you work, do you sit down and research and plan for your job, business and home affairs? Why not your body and your mind?
Did it take you that long to put the weight on or to get unfit? NO. Well sorry to be the bearer of bad news, it ain't going to happen that quickly either. The scales BTW are NOT your friend. They will not show you your dreams. They will make you obsessed, miserable and feeling like you have failed (when you have probably been quite good in some respect). If you cannot focus on anything else except those numbers on that scale, you need to bin them, now. You need to get your head into a healthier space about your body/weight. Because it isn't as simple as the numbers on the scale. They do not reflect who you are, what you have achieved, do they?
Stand in front of the mirror every night before you go to bed and say three things you were grateful for today - they could be anything. This is to get you into a positive habit of saying good things about yourself. They don't have to be body related at all. They could be a) I had a great meeting with my manager b) I got the early train home from work c) I feel great after my session at the gym d) saw a great movie with Jane. You get the idea.
How you are is how you think. If you think positive, you will reap positive. Yes shite happens, but you know what, it happens to everyone, that is life, that is living, that is part of becoming stronger and more determined to be a better you. Another favourite message from the lovely Mish Bridges, is "stop being the victim". Be strong. Be proud. No more excuses or blaming others.
You are what you eat. This takes time obviously to change how you feel within yourself. But notice the small things that happen when you start to take control and eat fresh wholesome foods and move your body - are you sleeping better, stressing less about stuff, is your skin glowing more, do you generally feel happy and more energetic? It will take a few weeks to kick in, but start noticing the little things that change. Stop focusing on the BODY image so much. Fall in love with who YOU are and you will start to find the journey to getting healthier and fitter easier (is there another word for journey, really)?
What are the main reasons for not achieving your goals, in general? Here are my reasons that I believe are stopping us from achieving our goals (to be fit, lose weight, run a marathon, learn how to hula hoop, whatever):
The fear of failing, the fear of trying something new and being out of your comfort zone, why are we so afraid to try new things, what honestly is going to happen to you? How do you think you will feel once you have completed the task you were afraid of?
(I have visions of me out at Home bush on the trapeze, I so wanted to be calm climbing that ladder and jumping, why was I so scared, I wasn't going to drop to my death, but it still crippled me)
Fear of being successful - what happens if you do achieve your goals, you will be out of your comfort zone so far you won't recognise yourself, which is a positive thing, but it is still change... which leads me to the next point...
Why do we worry how people perceive us?. We are so freaking worried about what other people might say or do that it can limit us. Why do we care so much about what people think about us? Be that unique person in your life, be that person that people talk about, saying look what they achieved! If they cannot handle it, then that is their problem and not yours. The issues they have with you are actually a reflection of how they see themselves, harsh but so very, very true. Some people like to see you unhappy because it makes them feel comfortable, that is not healthy and you don't need to be surrounded by toxic people who do not support you 100%.
I learnt many years ago that whilst I have long legs I will never look or be like Elle MacPherson (I know I know, I was so shocked too, I used to do her aerobics tape and everything)! Stop comparing yourself to others, they aren't you and you aren' t them. You need to achieve YOUR goals for YOU. You will probably have to do things differently to others to achieve them, because you know what we are all different, our bodies and minds are the same but they are slightly wired differently! Some could have injuries, have food tolerances, allergies - you need to work out what you CAN do and focus on that... you might be surprised what you find out about yourself.
***I am not perfect, I don't want to be perfect, I am just me, comfortable in my own skin and need to just give myself that little confidence boost now and then to remind me that I too can achieve anything I set out too.